Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

what did God say on the 7th day? -zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

Morning wood.

Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

why did the chicken cross the road he didnt he was hit by a van

nipple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...