what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

John and Henk are walking down the street. John kills a man, the cops are coming and John runs away. Why didn't Henk ran away? Henk was a rock

why are tree's green cause that's how god made it

Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

Question: How did the chicken get to the other side of the road? Answer: Too find his joint.

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

What is black and red? Something that is black and red.

A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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