What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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What's white and capable of flash photography? A pony, I lied about the photography.

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Why is Justin Biber so white? there's nothing in the closet.

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What's big and white?

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Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

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Chuck Norris.

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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What's red but smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why Did The Black Guy Eat Watermelon? Because he lives in south africa where they are commonly grown and needed a healthy snack.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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A Black Man Walks Into A Club.

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What did the guy at the office order on his pizza. Pepperoni :)

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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