If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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What did the hungry man do? He ate.

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

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Q: What did the man do when he won the lottery? A: He kept it for himself and left his family.

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Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

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Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

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You mom is so fat she appeals to my secret fetish.

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Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

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Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

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You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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