Womens' sports

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Why isn't this a joke? Because it's not.

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A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

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Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

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What is worse than running away from a rapist? Getting raped by a rapist.

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"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust? A: 2 Holocausts

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

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What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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why wouldn't the printer work? because there was an animal in it.

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Why did the young man not want to go to school? Because he had a large tumor on the left side of his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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