What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

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Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playhouse in her backyard? Well if you didn't, it was quite nice. I was her neighbor.

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1 fish 2 fish red fish wait why is the fish red , oh I forgot I killed it

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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David Silberberg is gay

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What do you call a sleeping bull? Don't call him anything and back away slowly.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I'm a fork. Fork you!!

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purple pickles

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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Your mama is so fat that when she farted she called it global warming

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a man walks into a bar. he orders a single drink, enjoys it, and drives home feeling a bit tipsy, but he was still able to operate his vehicle without an accident or a criminal charge.

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TWATFROST HOLOCOSTME sOME MONEY TO GET A BOOB JOB HAHAHAHA BALOWJOB

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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