What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why cant you see black people when you are playing hide and seek? Because they are in a very good hiding spot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops