Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

Jews

A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

hi

I was born.

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

Omg its that superman nope chuck testa

What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

What's black and white and roams the sea floor? A zebra.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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