donald................duck for president

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what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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Roses are black Violets are white I'm colorblind

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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What do you call a mother who is also your aunt and a father who is also your uncle? Incest

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Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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A man walked into a bar. It was very crowded so he decided to leave.

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What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

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You know what they say about a guy with big feet? He wears large socks and has big shoes.

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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cancer

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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