Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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7

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When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

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Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

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How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

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Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

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What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

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What did the duck say to the flag? NOTHING DUCKS CANT SPEAK or flags

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What is it called when you kill a gay man? Homocide

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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If the opposite of Pro is Con, whats the opposite of progress?

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What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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