How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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Black People.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

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How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

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What did the bowl of cereal say? Can I have some milk?

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Knock knock. Who's there You are.

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What's black, white, and red all over? The flag of the Arapaho Nation.

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I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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your going to die

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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