What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

What's 9+10? 19

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

You know whats annoying? Steve

How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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