Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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Your big dick.

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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