What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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9/11 my birthday

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops