What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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