Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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69.

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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