How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

Read a Book.

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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