Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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