Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...