"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

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a black man pays his child support

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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