You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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stinky boner

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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