What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

Anti Jokes = Drained

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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