why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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