Whats worse than suicide? death

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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