If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

What is white and black and red all over.

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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