Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Guest what in the butt

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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