Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? The sweet, merciful release of death at the hands of his father, who had been struggling with the emotional and financial drain of raising a severely disabled child for many years. It was only a matter of time before the man snapped, as he was a single parent working twenty hour days, seven days a week, to just barely cover all the medical bills that the specialists and therapy incurred.

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Why did the most interesting man in the world refuse to eat his buttered toast? It just so happens that the cook accidentally used stale bread, causing it to taste unsatisfactory.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

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Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

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What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops