Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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