Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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