How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

Women's rights.

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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