What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

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A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

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What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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