Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

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You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

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One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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