Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Stop driving smart cars you fags

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops