How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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PyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyong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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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