What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

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Once upon a time, there was a cat. He died.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

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What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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