Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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There was once a man who lived in a box.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had completed its task on the aforementioned other side and was returning back to the coop for a feeding now that the sun had set.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops