Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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