Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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