I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

What is your name? My name is Jeff

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

Ok class, we are doing arts and crafts today, but remember, have fun and be creative... Thats what she said

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

did you hear about the argument between jamie jacob and dylan? daniel killed them all

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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