What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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9/11 my birthday

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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