Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are black violets are black i am blind

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops