Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

0000000010000000000000001000000000000000000000011111111000000000111111000000000000000000011111000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000100000000000000000000000000000000000000001000000000000000000000000000000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000000000111100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001111111111111111100000000000000000000000001000000000000001000000000000000000000000001000000000000100000000000000000000000000001111111111111000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 SMILE

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops