Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

what this: b a dead one of these: p

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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