What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy walks into a bar. But this was a bar like a pole, so the man ended up with a broken nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

My cat just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops