Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where's my baby??

thumb_up thumb_down -10

three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A jew was walking down the street what did he see? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops