Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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