What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops