Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

^ That's not even funny ^

Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

HELLO BENJAMIN HELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMIN

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

What did the mexican do when 3 INS workers came to his house? He showed them his papers and it turns out he was a natural born US citizen. The mexican then proceeded to invite the INS into his home for a cup of coffee but they respectfully declined

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

guess what>? your mum lol

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...