Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

Why couldn't the mute kid tell his mom the house was on fire? Casue he fell down the stairs and broke his hands...

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Rush Limbaugh

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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