My spelling is horrible

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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Japan

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why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

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Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops