A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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catlin: hi Thomas: shut up bich 12 assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssl;

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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What is the diffrence between a jew and a mexican One is a religous practice and the other is a racial diversity

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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