Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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