Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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kkkk

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Why are anti-jokes funny? They are not because they have no punchline and if you wern't a complete dumbass you would have the ability to read the description on the right off the page.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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