You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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