Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

How you know when dislextic

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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