Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

a. why? b. because I wanted

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

bangers and mash?

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...